I don't think you amped up the clubby beat on this high enough! Great concept, so-so execution. I think I like the 5:34-6:04 section the best. The part starting at 6:04 was supposed to be crescendo of the entire tune, and your lead here sounds really whimpy, plus it misses all the portamentos badly, too (you did not pay attention to that after your SID2MIDI conversion, did you?).